Growing Edges

alexa lopez

He Completes Me

For the most part, I have adjusted to my husband’s employment abroad.

I’m not sure I like that. But I’m so glad it is temporary.

See, Richard and I are not merely spouses and co-parents; we are “besties.” Our souls are intertwined. We enjoy a closeness in our marriage that, I am sad to say, makes no sense to some people. We talk about everything! My husband would be uncomfortable if I were to explain the extent of our “connection.” Suffice to say that in all six of my pregnancies, HE experienced the morning sickness — no exaggeration. We are that connected.

Binky and Liz have this type of intertwined relationship; I believe Cathy and Randy and Catherine and Daniel do, too. But it confuses me that some couples are more cohabitants than they are two halves of the same glorious whole, and that they are okay with that! They live separate lives, keep entirely separate bank accounts, have different groups of friends, but share the same bed and parent the same kids.

I’m not judging these couples; such life management works for some of them. It is, admittedly, a perspective that I don’t grasp; in fact, I’ve been in that type of relationship before and I did not thrive — I withered. It did not work for me.

Now, understand that my Anchor and my foremost devotion in life is my Lord Jesus who in 1989 delivered me from the many destructive pathways that were my destiny had I been left to my own devices. But there is more: the man who saw in me what the Lord saw — someone worth loving.

Richard completes me. And I don’t consider it idolatry or blasphemy to say so. Living apart has been a growing experience and a challenge to learn about myself as an individual.

I can best describe our union as complementary. We’re “okay” when distance separates us, but we are better together, and that with God as the center of our union. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says that says a cord of three strands is not easily broken. Even with physical distance, our three-stranded cord remains intact. How thankful I am for that!

I can’t wait until my better half comes home. What a glorious day that will be!

© Alexa Lopez 2008

Page copy protected against web site content infringement by Copyscape

5 Comments »

  Giselle wrote @

Thanx Alexa… we do have the communication thing.. but I guess being of the same age.. the thoughts being so alike and the way we react also being so typical of the same age group, sometimes we let our ego take upperhand and i feel thats when things get out of hand… but we mak up after awhile when one of us calls the other and somehow gets talking and says sorry… i dont keep things in my mind.. its just a case of forgive and forget with me.. but he keeps things in his mind.. we are complete polar opposites in some ways.. but we both also know that we love each other more than anything else in this world and are willing to make our relationship work beautifully…v communicate and the chord that binds us is strong.. but still.. sometimes the conversation takes a little time to happen…
the problem i think is in my mind.. i do not want to be too dependant upon him and so, in some way or the other im coming off as too independant of him.. but i value him a lot.. and i just cannot imagine a life without him.. im working on this aspect.. but soemtimes it just gets out of control..
.. … … thnx for ur wishes.. and i hope i can keep him happy..im sure once we are together, everything is going to work out perfectly fine and that we will find ways to get aroun stuff.. :) cant wait for the marriage :)
http://4mgiselle.wordpress.com

  Liz wrote @

Mat and I definitely have that ‘thing’ – that cord that holds us together at all times. When Mat was in CA going to school for two and half years, it was hard being apart but we did it extremely well. I never wanted to be in a long-distance relationship and I would never recommend it to anyone, but for us it actually made us closer. For the first time I believed that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Sometimes I look at Mat and it’s almost like I’m seeing him for the first time again – and I get all giddy because it’s strange to think, “Wow. I’m MARRIED to this guy! And he’s my BEST FRIEND!”

I have a couple married friends who are far from this kind of relationship. One of my friends actually told me once that sometimes she hates her husband – like, fully hates him. I cannot even imagine being in a marriage like that. Another friend commented that she wished her husband would cheat on her so she wouldn’t feel bad about leaving him. I ache for my friends when I hear this – they don’t understand when I can’t commiserate. And then I feel bad to tell them that Mat and I are doing so great – that he and I are an extension of each other and being together everyday is awesome.

I wish every married couple could feel what we feel for our men!

  Alexa wrote @

We entered our marriage with the resolve that divorce would never be an option. He and I are very different in some ways but have been able to see our differences as gifts that bind us together. I come from a broken family and he does not, but we both brought different kinds of “baggage” into our adult lives that could either destroy our union or strengthen it. We choose to use every conflict as an opportunity to grow stronger and not to let those conflicts divide us. We are on the same team. And with our Lord at the very center of it, love can’t fail.

Best wishes for your upcoming wedding and marriage! Marriage is a beautiful gift. :grin:

  Giselle wrote @

Wow.. It must be lovely to have that feeling.. :) The perfect feeling of completeness …
That is what Im hoping to have in my marriage too..

http://4mgiselle.wordpress.com

  God’s Princess wrote @

Aww, that’s so cute mom!


Your comment

HTML-Tags:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <pre> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>